This post is based on an email that was sent and in no way reflects the views and opinions of ''Met'' or To send in a story send your email to [email protected]



Dear Pastor,
I hope you are doing well. I have read a lot about the inspiring words you have given others in the trouble of their time.
I am a 16-year-old girl who needs your advice. This is my first time writing you.
When I was younger, I was mistreated by my aunt for the way I look, my colour and because I was fatherless.
I remember when I was about four I was ill-treated. I was beaten even when I didn’t do anything wrong. My aunts would call me names like, ‘black puss’, ‘black gyal’ etc. I am of dark complexion, so I was given a lot of names. I would cry to myself at times, saying why I had to be born this way. Believe me, I was only four. My mother was in the town working and sending money so I could go to school in the country. I was treated very badly that at one point I tried to kill myself when I was just five.
When I was seven my mother took me to live with her. I thought that would have been the happiest days of my life. Growing up with my mother, I watched her being abused and beaten by my stepfather who she is still with.
He would cheat on her and even crossed the line and slept with her best friend who is now dead.
Over the years I would cry to myself and ask the Lord why I have to go through so much pain.
I remember when my mother took me aside one day and told me the story about my dad. She told me that when she told him she was pregnant, he told her to do an abortion but she refused. As a result of her not obeying him, he told her we both are going to suffer. I wanted to cry but didn’t show my emotions. I was only nine.
One day I got into an argument with my stepfather and he told me, “If yuh eva see how yuh black”.
I was so torn inside as if my heart melted. I stopped speaking to him for a week and was in primary school that time.
My mother and I would get into arguments at times and she would tell me how she disliked me and wished she had aborted me, and she even told me how black and ugly I am.
I am always crying to ease my pain. I was teased in primary school because of my complexion. Whenever a schoolmate and I got into a disagreement, I was considered to be one of the blackest child attending the school. Pastor, to tell you the truth, whenever someone says the word black and tells me how ugly and black I am, I was disgusted just by hearing the word ‘black’.
When my friends were taking pictures, I would stay out of it because their colour is lighter than mine and I didn’t want anyone teasing me. I would hit myself until I feel a lot of pain.
When I look back on my past, the way I was treated as a slave, it makes me depressed. I am fed up with life. It grew to a point where I can’t accept the way I look, whether I am beautiful or not. I cut my arms to ease my pain and would look in the mirror and hit myself to feel better.
Pastor, you won’t even know how I feel, God knows. I don’t love myself anymore. I go through a lot and this is not half of it. I wish I knew my father, even though my mother dislikes me and calls me names, I still pray to God for her to have a better life.
I don’t know what to do. Tears fill my eyes but I don’t want to release it because if my mother sees me crying, she will start to argue.
She lacks understanding. When I look back at my past, I hurt myself but I made a promise to God last week that I won’t hurt myself anymore and don’t want to break it.
Pastor, I know others have suffered a lot but I can’t take it any longer. I am going to take my life to get over everything and make my mother happy. She said I am the only one holding her back of the four children. I am the only girl for her. I just can’t deal with the shame. They even say I am dunce, even when I try my best. They are taking away my hopes and dreams.
Please help me, pastor.
Dear S.L.,
I know for sure that you are not dunce. A dunce person couldn’t have written and explained herself in such an intelligent way.
However, I am saddened by the way your mother and other relatives have treated you. They can be considered unintelligent. They should know you did not create yourself and did not have a choice whether you should be black, brown, white or yellow. Only ignorant people look down and condemn a person because of colour.
It is natural for a young child to retaliate or to feel depressed and unwanted if he/she is constantly told he/she is ugly. I am not at all surprised at your reaction.
Your aunt should have taught you how to deal with those who cursed and called you derogatory names but, instead, she did it at home. When you went to live with your mother, she continued to do the same thing.
However, keep heart. You need not be ashamed of your blackness. The way forward is not by having a light complexion. The way forward is having a good education. Nothing can stop an educated person.
Stop cutting up yourself. You don’t need to do that. When people say unkind things about you, ignore them. Study very hard. Get your passes. Go on to university. Pray and ask God to help you.
Believe me, He will. Give God thanks for taking care of you so far. Call me at my office and I will arrange for someone to see you. May God bless you. please let me hear from you again.


  • Sincere says:

    Wow so saddened by this young ladies comment. You would think that in this day and age we are more open minded about color. I want to applaud this young Lady because even though you may have suicidal thoughts, you are still here and that shows courage and the will to live. Like the pastor says “Education is the key.” I know that you may think for others giving you advise that it is easier said than done…….. but you are a beautiful, strong and courageous individual. You are you and once you start accepting you for who you are then baby there will be no stopping you. I know you will persevere and be strong. There is a light for you at the end of this tunnel……………

  • Tawkchuet says:

    Girl dont die live and rise so you can live to see the shame on their faces when they see you, the stone that the builder refuses will be the head cornerstone, I hope u understand that is just a phase of live that u will pass through and u will look back n say “I know they wish they were me now”. Smh y people wicked so we own flesh n blood

  • Observer says:

    Remember, God made us all in his own image. Your color is not to be cursed but be praised.

  • Pupping pop says:

    In the Name of Jesus I come against every demonic attack and spirit of abuse against this child. I can relate; growing up I was called “fat”, “ms. Piggy” and so forth by my father. He told me I would never amount to nothing. As a result I was looking for Love in all the wrong place and end up have mi son when mi a 17 year old. God knew what he was doing he is the best gift given to me from God. Young Lady people mistreat you to release demonic forces into your life. God is a giver if life, live it baby. Don’t wait for nobody to tell you you’re beautiful tell yourself. Everyday I tell myself I’m beautiful in the mirror and when mi do road all white people stop me and tell me how mi beautiful. Ladies believe in you nuh mek nuh body tear you down. Develop a prayer life and God will show you how valuable you really are. Blessing to her and everyone else who grow up in abuse.

  • Too much says:

    Girl, the devil is a LIAR!!!!!! We need to pry for this young lady and be mindful of how we talk to our children because what you put in, is what you’ll get out.te good thing is this girl knows she has a problem and is reaching out. I pray she gets the help. But if she should ever read this, your skin is not a curse, believe it or not it is a badge of honour. Don’t follow te bleacher creature dem…….their skin is in ruins. Work with what God has blessed u with

  • PhantomPhoenix says:

    She need to see pictures of Alex weks (name off a bit) she’s that Dark skin, African SUPER MODEL. She has gotten the best Ad spots, a best seller and Money fi buy her haters 10xs ova.

    Grace Jones is another inspiration….so my girl get out of that funk, tell yu madda an all yu haters a few choice words and PROGRESS AHEAD! Use the energy of you haters and distractors to FUEL your future SUCCESS.

  • Original Goodas says:

    buy the time me get to the middle me a bawl… me naa talk no little crying me a talk bout real bawling.

    Why can people be so cruel and hearless.

    Sweetheart, keep the faith and prove them wrong. No u are not a dunce, you letter seems to come from a very bright young lady with a promising future dont let the dunce u call mother and aunts take that from you

  • Cindy Royal says:

    :shakehand2 @ Phantom! Reading this it’s Alex Wek who is most prominent in my mind, plus the many other dark skinned super models, who don’t even have the trademark traits of what society calls beautiful, but are doing exceedingly well in international modeling.

    I think the dwarf in Game of Thrones says it best, in essence wear ur flaws like a badge of honour so when they try to use it against u it has no effect. They may hate her complexion, but if she simply accepted that she is perfectly made whenever they come after her she would know how to flip it on them making them feel like the shit. I pray her eyes open to the truth soon.

  • Tawkchuet says:

    Cindy u watch GOT we friends!!!!!!!!!!! :shakehand2

  • Cindy Royal says:

    I’m hooked on GOT Chuet. Right now, Sunday seems so far away, & that’s if post it Monday. *sigh*

  • Tawkchuet says:

    Me too Cindy thats my favorite I watch it on Sundays n then during the week I replay on “On Demand” Hbo where I watch the new series from start all over again this is too funny who knew right

  • Observer says:

    lawd chuet nuh badda showoff caw yuh hav cable :hammer

    @ pupping pop..BEAUTIFUL WORDS AND INSIGHT…at demmm. I hope sender reads :)

  • Brightlight says:

    This is a serious matter. Us black people do more mental and spiritual damage to our own than white people can ever do! It is cold as f000 to make a black person, especially a child, to feel bad about the color of their natural birth right skin tone.

    We can sit here and talk but look how people talk about the artist Spice whenever she was put up here? There’s always those few ppl where the 1st thing they mention when they dissing her or someone of her complexion is “BLACK”!

    The truth is we black people worship high color, even if they don’t admit it out loud, internally many of us prefer light over dark skin. I had a boyfriend where every time we got into an argument I would call out his complexion 1st when I’m cussing him. One time he said in the midst of our argument, “How come you always mentioning my complexion when we arguing?” I swear, from that day I never mention his complexion again. Besides having a mother who taught me better than that, in that moment I had to check myself.

    This is terrible and I can go on and on about parents, particularly mothers, who hate their daughters (since males can get away with being dark skinned) because they came out “too black”. Children teasing another child about their color. Anywhere you see images of black beauty it is usually a woman high in color. It’s sad but it isn’t going anywhere. If this young girl grew up in a home where her color was praised, then when she step foot outside her door no one could tell her shit! But because it is coming from the place where her foundation is supposed to be set it’s like how do u stand up strong against that? It will take constant positive reinforcement from others and from herself to build up against the years of bad treatment she has received in her life. That doesn’t go away overnight.

    I feel terrible for her.

  • Anonymous says:

    Boy this is so sad. Where is the love for one another? If you truly love someone you would not see their skin colour. Her parents/guardians drop the ball big time bucks dem shoulda being teaching her to be proud of every part of her. I really hope she overcomes this and shove it in dem face when she succeeds in life. I pray for victory in Jesus’ name for this young girl.
    And isn’t it ironic that we lay wid black men and when the black pickney come we vex…..boy if God was like man eeeh…….smh

  • PhantomPhoenix says:

    Cindy, I love to look at Alex and people with that even dark complexion. At times I wish I had just one even skin tone and most times I wish I had to dark, shinny tone.

    Me nah go hide and talk but there are some ugly people(regardless a skin colour) in the world…but if dem intelligent, kind, funny, hygiene up to par and confident…dem good looking to me. Me will appear ugly to people as well, but me set me self away that I am beautiful to those who are attracted to ME and from this girl letter she need chics like us to boost har.

    Me a bad breed me we be de fren fi cuss out har people dem and spen me money fi mek she look fashionable and get har a man fi boost and defend har even

  • Too much says:

    True [email protected]…..We really need to be more considerate with our utterances. Even if u don’t mean anything, the next person may not know that

  • Dee says:

    Met, I wish I was able to get a hold of this young lady and help her. How long ago was this letter written? Was it recent?
    Any idea how I would go about getting to her?

    I woulda go shop fi her right now….try lift up her spirit…mi have pickney and mi cant imagine how a mother coulda say things like that to them pickney

  • ThEXOnE says:

    I hope Pastor helps her, she obviously has a light thats shining thats why they’re trying to out it…oh boy.

  • MzBee says:

    i sincerely hope and pray she didnt take her life.. i am the darkest of my siblings and trust me i dont care what anyone says, my black is beautiful…even older ppl sometimes feel like outcast when treated that way so i can just imagine a child having to go thru it..I pray God continues to guide her and protect her from all physical, verbal and mental abuse..

  • Me says:

    My heart ache for you. I hope and pray that God will guide and protect you and ease all your pain and suffering in the name if Jesus. I am so sorry you have to go through this.

  • MzUptown says:

    This article had me crying and I pray God intervenes before this young lady ends her life. I hope God directs her to this website and she reads these comments. Young Lady, u are beautifully created in the image wanted u to be. I used to feel the same as you do growing up, I was the only girl for my dad and he didn’t like girls only his boys,my mom took off left me with my grandma, I had no parents only my grandma and pa,I grew up feeling unloved because my parents didn’t want me,yet I was never short of love from my grand-parents. I got good grades and when I was finished with high school I migrated here with the help of my aunt,my dad filed for his sons but needed my aunt to be the sponsor,when she checked the papers,my name wasn’t included and she wouldn’t signed those papers unless he had my name on it. To make amtters even worst, he never told his wife about me,the first time she heard about me was when my aunt mentioned the issue of me not being on the papers. Long story short, I came here and on the day I was graduating high school in broward county, the speaker was this well dressed lady,she was introduced as Judge Ilona Holmes,she spoke about her struggles and that while growing up in Georgia,she was the darkest of her siblings,she was often teased and her mother’s friend would call her names making reference to her complextion. that black negro,as they would called her, became the Chief judge for Broward county,not only was she the first female to hold that position but she was the first black woman. Her speech had me crying and it motivated me to but the people who talked down on me,my mother and her side of family is very light skinned and I am dark, so they also had nothing to do with me,I have never met by mother’s father and he lives 20 mins from where I stayed. I shut them up real good,oh yes honey I toiled day and night and today I am a Director of Nurse at a 188 bed facility with degrees and National Certification along with my accreditation. When I sign my name, I have so many titles behind it,I went above and beyond to put them to shame and let them eat their words. Honey wipe those tears because weaping endures for a night but Joy Cometh in the morning. This too Shall Pass!

  • Tawkchuet says:

    MzUptown u made my eyes water I’m so proud of u, thanks for sharing ur story I hope she reads this

  • Quiet Storm says:

    OMG Mz Uptown, u have me on the brink of tears. I really hope someone directs her to JMG and to your comment…. Now datz what I’m talking bout. You go girl!!! I am proud of you and I’m sure you’re proud of yourself as well

    Thanks to your Aunt for looking out for you. God always sends someone

  • Met says:

    mzuptown :kiss :kiss u journey nuh done u dem seh di stone whey di builder refuse …………… much love and thanks for sharing…God nuh done wid u yet oooo

  • dick r harde says:

    first of all…dis pastor is a f000ing idiot…..stop cutting yourself….does this raas idiot not understand self mutilation is a sign of serious psychological issues…just saying stop cutting yourself is like saying stop drinking to an alcoholic….secondly unnu fi stop pray to god and all dese tings….no every day unnu claims say everyting dat happen is god’s will… if di poor child living in hell no god’s will dat… why di raas unnu ago pray fi di opposite happen…..

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

[+] kaskus emoticons nartzco

Current day month [email protected] *

DISCLAIMER The views or opinions appearing on this blog are solely those of their respective authors. In no way do such posts represent the views, opinions or beliefs of “Met,” or “Met” and will not assume liability for the opinions or statements, nor the accuracy of such statements, posted by users utilizing this blog to express themselves. Users are advised that false statements which are defamatory in nature may be subject to legal action, for which the user posting such statements will be personally liable for any damages or other liability, of any nature, arising out of the posting of such statements. Comments submitted to this blog may be edited to meet our format and space requirements. We also reserve the right to edit vulgar language and/or comments involving topics we may deem inappropriate for this web site.

****RULES**** 1. Debates and rebuttals are allowed but disrespectful curse-outs will prompt immediate BAN 2. Children are never to be discussed in a negative way 3. Personal information  eg. workplace, status, home address are never to be posted in comments. 4. All are welcome but please exercise discretion when posting your comments , do not say anything about someone you wouldnt like to be said about  you. 5. Do not deliberately LIE on someone here or send in any information based on your own personal vendetta. 6. If your picture was taken from a prio site eg. fimiyaad etc and posted on JMG, you cannot request its removal. 7. If you dont like this forum, please do not whine and wear us out, do yourself the favor of closing the screen- Thanks! . To send in a story send your email to :- [email protected]