ONE OF MY LITTLE ANGELS WROTE IN * TEARS*

Everyday on this site people come in and share both positive and negative experiences and opinions. Well here is mine. Before I logged onto this site I was a supporter and promoter. I would ignore my job,ignore my children,drink,smoke, meet and have sex with different men from parties, because they gave me money, and the list goes on. Its not until I found myself  pregnant with my 3rd child that I decided I was gonna  have an abortion. When I was scheduling the abortion, I was scheduling it around someone’s dance and if I would recover in time to attend the out of town party. I put it off so many times I was almost 9 wks. One Sunday night I decided to share my decision to abort this child with an unknown person. I’ve never seen this person face to face, but for some reason I felt a connection to this individual. I shared the fact that I was aborting this baby and there was no way around it. I’m not with the father, he’s in and out of town and has other kids. Plus, right now my lifestyle can’t fit another child. Up until this conversation with this unknown person, my mind was made up. She asked me to give her one good reason why I was having this abortion. And to be honest with you all and myself, I didn’t have one. I just knew that a baby didn’t fit right now. I’d be pregnant and couldn’t go out. If I didn’t go to this party, annual affair, annual boatride, then my party wouldn’t do as good as I imagined. No I can’t have this baby because I have to support and promote. Its the summer time, I have to be on this boatride and I have to attend certain parties, to bring the crowd to mine. I can’t do that with a belly. No way…. I didn’t share those views with the person I was communicating with, for fear she would judge me. After I spoke with her, she asked that I pray and consider keeping the child .She said that God makes no mistakes and this is a blessing in disguise. I told my friends I was “getting rid of it” and that was final. The very next day I got up that morning feeling funny, I guess “it” was hungry and wanted to eat. I said to myself “Well I guess your hungry,so we must eat”. So I got “it” something to eat and was ready to smoke. I picked up the spliff to put to my lips and I got sick… WTF is going on right now? I was vomitting… I thought to myself,” I’m having this abortion in 2 days and now this belly wants to breed me” At the same time my best friend called me and asked what I was doing. I told her “Right now I’m doing nothing, but I tell you what I’m not doing. I’m not having the abortion. I’m gonna keep my baby” God sends angels to you in all shapes,sizes, and forms.  A mere conversation with an individual that you do not know, however your soul may take to them, may save your life or improve it for the better. From that day I decided to keep my son,who is now 6 months old. When I look into his eyes and think that I was going to get rid of him, all because I wanted to party and live this dancehall lifestyle, its mind blowing. This website in my opinion was not created to destroy or belittle anyone. It is the eye opener to fix the corruption in your life and to perhaps make a change. When you find yourself stealing,sleeping with men or women for money, drinking, smoking, and losing all of your inhibitions, then you are losing control of life itself. The stories and the videos and the hype is going no where. Since I’ve stopped partying I’ve actually been able to save money, which is something I’ve never been able to do. I don’t feel that there is anything missing in my life, because I am now a better mother and role model for my 3 kids. Any event or function that would call for you to leave your kids with God Knows Who, or to take them out of their warm beds and out into the cold, to a baby sitter, just for you to party, is promoted by the devil.  Its the devil making you sleep with these men and women for money, or steal clothing, or to borrow money that you know you can’t payback, or to perform 3somes accepting those “packages” and bringing those “packages” All so you can get a dress or an outfit to wear to “so and so’s dance”. This site I believe was made to open up the eyes of certain people that don’t even realize why or what is motivating them to keep coming back and to keep going to these parties. Its the same scene, the same people every time, nothing changes. The men that you dress up for and get all dolled up for are watching you like a hawk. While your drunk and high and talkin up about your “good hole”, please remember there is a man waiting in the wings watching you like a hawk, with images of violating you and taking advantage of you and for what cost. Whatever cost you decide your worth. Remember ” A real man knows a real woman, when he sees her. And a real man can’t deny a “Womans Worth” Thanks Shani and JMG for helping me make the right decision. Upon our conversation that faithful Sunday night, my life has changed for the better, God and my 3 healthy children are first in my life. And I have you to thank…