Can a mother be this wicked?
Dear Taiwo,

Please, help me out. I am going crazy because of the way my mother has been meddling with my affairs. It has got to a stage that I cannot take it any longer. The funniest and most painful thing is that those who are supposed to understand my actions are the ones nailing me.

I celebrated my 30th birthday in January, and I want to believe that I should be able to handle my affairs myself. My travails started when I was in 200 level in a state university. My mother, a successful textile businesswoman asked me to come home from school for the weekend. It wasn’t a strange request.

However, when I arrived, I met her at the shop, I had no cause to feel anything was wrong, until when we got home and I realised that her friend who was in the shop with her came home with us.

After dinner, she introduced her to me as her childhood friend who resided in the Northern part of the country. Her mission in the South West; however was to look for a wife for her only son who lived in England.

My mother then informed me that both of them had spoken and decided that I should marry her friend’s son. She went ahead to inform me that plans would start the following week to get me a passport so I could join my mother’s friend’s son (Ahmed) in England as soon as possible. To say I was shocked, was putting it mildly. She showed me Ahmed’s photograph and assured me that I would love him. His mother also spoke with me, but I was still dazed and shocked to utter any word.

Both mothers advised that I stayed back on Monday to begin the process of obtaining my international passport. This was the beginning of my travails because, eventually, I had to drop out of school in my 200 level to face the processing of getting a visa to UK which sadly I never got till date.

Along the line, a formal introduction and engagement was organised, but Ahmed was absent, his immediate junior brother stood in for him. I kept praying that things would work out, but I really do not know why all these happened to me.

After waiting for almost three years, I realised that the overseas trip would not materialise. I then told my mother that I would like to go back to school, but she refused.

She claimed that if I went back to school, there would be temptation for me to date other guys and I realised that her major fear was my boyfriend who I was forced to abandon for my mother’s arranged marriage.

So instead of allowing me to go back to school, she gave up one of her shops for me to manage. Instead of respite , it fuelled a quarrel between my siblings and I.

I am the third daughter she had for my father and two others, (a boy and a girl) for another man. My elder sisters did not like the idea that she gave the shop to me and I had to contend with this too.

This, however, did not create much problem, but the fact that my life is grounded.

Although, Ahmed was always nice whenever we spoke on phone and he tried to make me believe that everything would be okay, but I never understood the reason my visa application was rejected all the time I tried to apply

My major problem however, started three months ago when Ahmed stopped speaking with me on phone.

I have never seen him before and the funniest thing was that despite the fact that I was unable to get a visa to the UK to meet my betrothed husband, his mother and two other siblings visited him and came home with news and gifts for me. There and then, Ahmed stopped calling me and if I called him, he wouldn’t reply nor call back. I sent him several text messages, e-mails and even messages on the facebook without any reply. I noticed that for a long time he was not available on-line for chat even on facebook. Whenever I asked his mother what was happening, she would tell me that all was well. One of his siblings however told me that he had some problems with the immigration office. I raised this with my mother, she told me the problem he had was not something that could not be sorted out, and in fact she told me that she spoke with Ahmed several times.

I wondered why Ahmed would speak with my mother and his own people and not me. I made sure I told my mother all these and whenever I did, she would ask me to be patient.

I also learnt that his mother travelled to England to stay with him for over six months, I kept wondering why my visa application was not granted while others had theirs.

When I called my mother’s attention to all the information I got concerning Ahmed and his people, she told me to be patient and face my business, she said she wasn’t ready to lose all she has spent trying to get me a visa and other travelling documents if I refused to marry Ahmed. I was shocked when she told me this. Because I thought my happiness should matter to her and not the money she had spent, because this wasn’t my making. She disrupted my life by pulling me out of school and rendering me useless.

I discussed this issue with my elder sister, who happens to be my confidant and she told me to do whatever I know would make me happy. She made me realise that she wasn’t in support of my mother from the outset and that was why she did not intervene all along.

She also told me that my mother and Ahmed’s went into this partnership because my mother owed Ahmed’s mother some money and the arranged marriage was a way of pleasing her. Hearing this made me unhappy and I did not want to confront my mother because of the source of the information.

Consequently, I wanted a way out, but I did not know what to do or how to go about it because I had lost all my contacts, friends.

I feel inferior whenever I saw any of my friends. Another problem I had to contend with was that of funds. Despite the fact that my mother gave me one of her outlets, I never had a free hand, I had to report every transaction to her and all she does was pay my salary. Although that was not our initial agreement, but as time went on this began to happen.

It was also about this time that my mates came back from the service year. Learning about this compounded my problems.

Way back in school, I was dating a guy who worked in one of the new generation banks in town then. We had a good relationship; I was not given enough time to explain the situation of things to him when I left school abruptly. All the while that he called I told him a lot of lies to cover up for what happened to me. In fact, at a time I lied to him that I had travelled out of the country.

When I was going through all these, a friend of mine who was my coursemate stood with me and tried to help me several times by taking me to see her pastor. She remains the source where I get all information about our other friends.

Few days after her service, she called to inform me that she would be coming on a visit with a guest. She did not tell me who the guest was and I didn’t ask her because the last person I was expecting to see with her was Kolade, the guy I dated in school.

Apparently, Kolade travelled to the US not long after I stopped seeing him. They met few days after he came into the country. Naturally, they spoke about me and I guess she told him all I was going through.

He did not hesitate to ask her to bring him to me. When I saw him, I felt bad, but he told me not to worry. Kolade said my friend told him all that happened to me and he said he was willing to have me back if I would not mind and that if it would be possible for us to get married before he leaves the country because this would easily facilitate my travelling documents.

My mother however would not hear of this, she opposed every step I took and threatened to disown me if I disobeyed her. We were on this when I learnt that Ahmed’s mother returned from another trip to the UK where she went to take care of her grandchild. I wouldn’t have been too enraged if the baby was a half-caste, but the baby was mothered by another Yoruba lady. This time, I did not inform my mother before going to see Ahmed’s mother. I gave her a piece of my mind.

Could you believe that Ahmed called me that day? He pleaded with me to give him some time to explain and make it up to me. I played along, but I knew that it was over between us.

My problem however, is my mother; I don’t know why she is insisting that my life be destroyed.

She has vowed to make me miserable and her hostility towards Kolade is frightening.

Please, what can I do? Help me.

Binta, Ibadan.

DEAD END IN CITY RUBOUT: Cops question, release person of interest in brazen execution
Confounded cops struck out again last night when they released a 40-year-old man they had grilled for hours in the slaying of 31-year-old Brandon Woodard of California.

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BY ROCCO PARASCANDOLA , NANCY DILLON AND GINGER ADAMS OTIS / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS

Police are still searching for the gunman that executed Brandon Woodard in cold blood.

It is the case of curious clues, tantalizing leads and yet no keys to crack the murder of a young father who was gunned down on a busy Manhattan street.

Confounded cops struck out again last night when they released a 40-year-old man they had grilled for several hours in the slaying of 31-year-old Brandon Woodard of California.

Sources said the Queens man is the boyfriend of a woman who rented the getaway car, a Lincoln MKZ. But the man, who may be a friend of the getaway driver’s, is not a suspect, police sources said Wednesday night. And it appears the woman loaned the car to someone else before the grisly slaying.

Then there’s the connection to a gruesome killing in Queens, an ambush in which three men who had been at a Brooklyn shindig thrown by a local party planner were sprayed by 63 bullets from an AK-47 as they sat in a car. A cell phone police tracked in the Woodard killing is registered to the party planner who hosted that event, a source said.

Woodard himself had three cell phones in his possession, one of which seems to have directed him by message right into the path of his assassin around 2 p.m. Monday.

COURTESY WOODARD FAMILY

Brandon L. Woodard

The victim walked right past the man who would in a few minutes pump a bullet into his head. Had he kept going, who knows? But Woodard doubled back after someone apparently sent him the message that made him return.

Video surveillance shows the ice-cold killer watching his victim as he heads east on W. 58th St. Police suspect the murderer let Woodard pass because the street at that moment may have been too crowded for the hit.

The getaway car had pulled into a parking spot about 20 minutes before Woodard was killed, and video footage also showed the hit man casually leaning against the car door. He watched Woodard exit the Thompson Hotel and head east.

Woodward didn’t react as he passed the predator, who then leaned into the passenger door of the sedan and spoke to someone inside. The foot traffic was heavy at the time.

A few minutes later, Woodard doubled back, heading west along a less-crowded street and appearing to be reading something on a cell phone.

Cops are pursuing the case “aggressively,” Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly said Wednesday.

RELATED: GUN USED TO KILL LAW STUDENT ALSO USED IN QUEENS SHOOTING YEARS AGO – COPS

They’re paying particular attention to three cell phones Woodard brought with him from Los Angeles. He left one in his luggage but was carrying two with him.

Officers in the 113th Precinct in Queens found the getaway car Tuesday night with the help of high-tech license plate readers. Cops got the license plate number as the sedan went through the Midtown Tunnel shortly after Woodard’s murder.

“Obviously, we are very much interested in what information was on the phone at that time,” Kelly told reporters Wednesday.

Police may have also uncovered a link between Woodard’s execution-style murder and a triple homicide that occurred in Queens over the summer, a police source said.

The victims in that killing, three men, were parked in front of a friend’s house in Springfield Gardens that the party planner threw on July 7.

The men had gotten into a fight with others at the party, who followed the victims to Springfield. The shooters sprayed them with a hail of AK-47 bullets as the men sat in their parked car. Cops said at the time that 63 shots were fired from the assault rifle.

One of the cell phones police tracked in the Woodard killing is registered to the party planner who hosted the July event, a source said.

COURTESY WOODARD FAMILY

Brandon Lincoln Woodard, seen here with an unknown little girl on his lap.

NYPD detectives have flown to Los Angeles to get a search warrant for the victim’s home and dig deeper into Woodard’s background. Police don’t have a clear motive for the killing, but they are investigating Woodard’s ties to the entertainment business and possible drug world connections.

Woodard’s parents, unaware Wednesday afternoon that the NYPD had brought someone in for questioning, were overcome with emotion when they learned the news.
The victim’s mother, Sandra Wellington, put her hand over her face and reached out to her husband for support.

“We’re just hopeful that whoever did this will be brought to justice,” stepdad Rodney Wellington told the Daily News. “She’s very fragile right now,” he said.

“Thank you. Thank you,” he said, grateful for the news

MARCUS SANTOS FOR NEW YORK DAILY NEWS

Blood is visible on the sidewalk at the scene of the shooting near Columbus Circle.

Police also interviewed a young woman Wednesday who was with Woodard for what turned out to be his last supper, on Sunday night.
Kelly said Woodard landed at Kennedy Airport around 5 p.m. Sunday. He checked into the Thompson Hotel around 6:30 p.m.

He watched a football game with the female companion, and the two then went out for dinner at a nearby restaurant, Kelly said.

Woodard left his hotel Monday shortly before 1:30 p.m., and told the concierge he would return for his luggage. He never did.

Police searched his room and his bags but found nothing to tell them why the man had come to New York. His family is equally mystified.

Brandon L. Woodard
Woodard, father to a 4-year-old girl, had an extensive criminal history, mostly stemming from drug-related charges.
A law student at the University of West Los Angeles, he had 20 prior arrests for drugs and robbery, among other things. He was charged with cocaine possession in California in June.

Woodard was killed with a weapon that detectives determined was used in a random shooting in St. Albans, Queens, in 2009.

His parents Wednesday were dealing with the sad details of bringing Woodard’s body home for burial.
“Sandra Wellington is still in shock,” said family spokesman Fred MacFarlane. “At this juncture, the family doesn’t know any rationale for what happened, why it happened.”

MacFarlane added that the family’s primary goal now is to shelter Woodard’s little girl from the tragic truth.

“I don’t think that they have discussed this yet with the 4-year-old daughter. They’re trying to protect her,” he said.

With Joe Kemp and Oren Yaniv
[email protected]

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/police-grill-couple-rented-car-midtown-execution-article-1.1218437#ixzz2Ew6jbUTt

Getaway car found in slaying of Calif. man, NYPD says

A still video image shows the gunman pulling a gun out of his pocket moments before shooting 31-year-old Brandon Lincoln Woodard Monday afternoon in Manhattan.

NEW YORK — Police revealed Wednesday that they found a getaway car used in an execution-style daylight slaying of a Los Angeles man on a busy Manhattan street — a possible break in a case that has defied easy answers.

No motive or suspects have been identified in the shooting of Brandon Lincoln Woodard. But New York Police Department officers located the missing Lincoln sedan — parked and unoccupied — during a sweep of a Queens neighborhood with high-tech license plate readers, Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly said at a news conference about an unrelated drug takedown.

Police also have interviewed a woman who spent time with Woodard the evening before a gunman put a bullet in the back of his head in midtown, a block from Central Park. The woman and Woodard watched an NFL game together at his hotel before going out to dinner, Kelly said.

The NYPD has sent detectives to Los Angeles to obtain a search warrant for the victim’s home, the commissioner said. The manhunt for the gunman and his getaway driver “is going forward aggressively,” he said.

Kelly declined to comment on reports that the getaway car had been rented by someone other than the hit team and possibly loaned to them for the hit.

The 31-year-old Woodard — described variously as a promoter, petty criminal, would-be lawyer and family man — was killed Monday afternoon after he checked out of a hotel on nearby Columbus Circle and possibly lured into an ambush a few blocks away.

The killer had arrived at least 30 minutes before the gunfire erupted. The man, who appears to be bald and have a beard, could be seen on surveillance video exiting the passenger side of the parked Lincoln sedan and pacing as he waited, police said.

After Woodard got there, he checked his phone and walked back and forth as if looking for an address, police said. A security photo — released to seek the public’s help in identifying the gunman — shows him reaching into his pocket for a pistol moments before he fired a single deadly round.

The shooter left Woodard in a pool of blood on the sidewalk, slipped into the same Lincoln sedan and was driven away.

Kelly said Wednesday that investigators were still examining three phones carried by Woodard when he flew to New York City for unclear reasons on Sunday. Two were found on his body and one in luggage he left at his hotel.

Sandra and Rodney Wellington, Woodard’s mother and stepfather, released a statement Tuesday urging anyone with information on the killing to contact police.

“There are no words to express our shock and sadness in the face of our family’s horrendous tragedy. We eagerly await justice for Brandon,” the statement said.

They described him as a “gentle and generous young man,” a devoted father and son who loved sports.

Woodard graduated from Campbell Hall High School and earned a bachelor’s degree from Loyola Marymount University, the statement said.

Authorities in Los Angeles and Las Vegas have said Woodard had a criminal record in both cities.

Woodard had been due back in court Jan. 22 following his arrest by Los Angeles County sheriff’s deputies in West Hollywood in April on a felony cocaine possession charge. He had previously pleaded not guilty.

Woodard attended the Whittier Law School in Costa Mesa for two semesters in the fall of 2010 and the spring of 2011, school spokeswoman Judy DeVine said. However, she declined to provide details of his records, what he was studying or why he left, citing privacy laws.

(Associated Press writer Robert Jablon in Los Angeles contributed to this report.)

The talking bird that recently caused commotion at Mbare Musika safely arrived in Chipinge and is now in Sekuru Mudapaviri Ndoro’s hands.

Speaking to our news crew two days ago, the Dzivarasekwa cross-border trader Immaculate Chirunga (33), sho was caught with the bird, said:

“The bird arrived safely at Sekuru Ndoro’s place the following day. Shiri yakasvika zvakanaka. I was attacked by a strong wind that confused me when I arrived at Birchenough Bridge at around 3am the following day. I later opened my eyes the bird had disappeared,” narrated the woman.

Immaculate indicated that Sekuru later confirmed that the bird had disappeared into his possession. She claimed that the US$350 meant for Sekuru Ndoro had turned into a bird. This was meant to ensure that the money got to the sangoma without Immaculate having to travel ton Chipinge.

“On that day after the Mbare rank incident I left the police station to go home to collect the juju and travel to Birchenough Bridge where all this happened. I have invited my mother to help me in this entire situation because I was under pressure as my brother was unhappy.”

She also indicated that she was introduced to Sekuru by her boyfriend who was attacked by the ‘weird birds’ before he died.

“I was introduced to Sekuru Ndoro by my late boyfriend uyo akarohwa nezvishiri akafa,” she added.

The woman said the mishap occurred when she was going for introductions to the boyfriends relatives.

“Ndakafonerwa kuti akarohwa nezvishiri achibva afa, as I was on my way to be introduced to his relatives. From that incident I was working with Sekuru Ndoro perfectly until now since he helped me recover my goods from the thieves.

Our News Crew is well informed that Sekuru Ndoro visited Harare via Shurugwi where he was called to help someone who lost his beasts to cattle rustlers.

“Sekuru is in Harare and he proceeded to Shurugwi to help someone recover the cattle he lost to rustlers. I have no problems when crossing at the border post since they just select my bags and let me go. So I am not afraid of anything or anyone,” revealed the single mother.

She however, said she has no rest from people demanding to know the whereabouts of Sekuru Ndoro and his contact details.

“People are coming to me demanding help and they think I can help them solve their problems. Many are promising cars and houses if I help them. I have no rest since that day you published the story,” she said.

Immaculate, unfortunately, refused to disclose Sekuru Ndoro’s mobile number. “I am not giving anyone Sekuru’s phone number because he does not deal with strangers.”

The Lookout
by Cara Hanson

Hebrews 4:13 (NIV)
Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.

Hebrews 4:13 (KJV)
Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.

The New International Version of Hebrews 4:13 is much easier to swallow than the King James translation, since “uncovered” implies that if I get caught sinning, I can quickly pull a covering over me for safety. When you’re naked, however, that’s it; you’re nude, exposed, in the raw. Like the great Motown song says, “Nowhere to run to, baby, nowhere to hide.” [1] Nudity makes people squirm, which is exactly what this verse does to the reader.

On the contrary, most young children love to run around naked. At one point or another, all three of our children have escaped from the bathtub, squealing with glee as they raced through our house. It reminded me of how some county fairs invite people to try catching a muddy piglet as it races through the pen. The audience roars with laughter as the poor contestant falls on his face in the mud. If these contenders really want a challenge, they should try catching a wet and naked toddler.

Our two year old, Nate, loves it when his clothes and diaper finally come off at the end of the day. He prances around like he has his own float in a parade and all that’s missing is the marching band. He so loves his newly found freedom that he starts screaming, “Nakey-Dakey! Nakey-Dakey!” which is Toddler-speak for “I’m letting it all hang out.” Somewhere between toddlerhood and late childhood, the appeal of public nudity vanishes (hopefully). We become aware of sin, and, like Adam and Eve after The Fall, start searching for the fig leaves. Before eating the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they were both naked, “and they felt no shame” (Gen. 2:25). After they had sinned, they “made coverings for themselves” (Gen. 3:7). Then they literally hid from God in the garden. Apparently, they should have eaten from the tree that taught never to play hide-and-seek when God is “IT.” As soon as sin entered the world, it was accompanied by the desire to hide that sin from God.

Young children have no reason to be ashamed; they can run with their bare biscuits to the wind and have no worries. By the time we reach adulthood, we have developed numerous areas in our lives to “cover up,” thanks to our sin nature. How many fig leaves would it take to hide our sins? Figuratively speaking, we have so much to conceal that we would be walking fig trees. But God gave us a Savior, Jesus Christ, who loved us enough to pay the price for those sins with his life. Interestingly, the Bible tells us that “love covers over a multitude of sins” (1 Pet. 4:8). Thank you, Lord, for covering us with love so that we do not have to wear those ridiculous-looking fig outfits.

We do not need to hide our sins from God; He sees everything anyway. I can only imagine what He was thinking when Adam and Eve tried to fool Him. With their cute little tree costumes, they must have looked ready to perform in a low budget elementary school play. The other day our daughter, Grace, decided to cover every inch of her easel with stickers. As soon as she realized her foolishness, she draped the easel with blankets and a large basket, in an attempt to hide the evidence. Sadly, the cover up brought even more attention to the wrongdoing. I can’t say that I blame her; adults are not much better in their efforts to hide sins.

It is too daunting to think that nothing is hidden from God, so we fool ourselves into thinking that He is only watching when we are being good. Somehow when we are about to sin, God miraculously has to take an emergency phone call from one of His angels. Okay, now that He’s distracted I can do whatever I want. Hey, if I can’t see God, then He can’t see me, right? The root of this theory forms during childhood, when we learn to hide our sins by hiring a “lookout.”

My career as a lookout began in early childhood. When my older brother and sister used to have boxing matches, my job was to stand in the corner and “be the bell.” At the start of each round, I would yell, “DING!” and they would attack each other like pit bulls on poodles. Since being a bell was only a part-time position and I had higher career aspirations, my other job was to watch out for Mom and Dad, who had already deemed boxing an “illegal” household activity.

Sometimes I was also the lookout during “War,” which was basically pelting each other with marshmallows and grapes from behind the trenches of the sofas. These battles were so intense that when my parents sold our home twenty years later, we found the casings of several “rounds” of what my siblings and I like to believe were remnants of either marshmallows or grapes. As the former lookout, I was extremely proud of myself that our shenanigans had remained a secret throughout the years.

In an odd role reversal, I was walking down the hallway the other day, when I heard my three year old proclaim, “Quick! Mommy’s coming!” I then heard our kids frantically scrambling to hide something, and by the time I had opened the door, all three of them were sitting primly in their chairs, each looking like the cat that swallowed the canary. “Wow,” I thought. “It’s payback time. One of my kids is now on the lookout for ME.” When you know your children well, it’s not hard to discover the mastermind behind the mischief–in this case, our three year old, Luke. I decided not to tell him that he needs to work on his stealth capabilities.

This amusing situation reminded me that all things are naked before God. Whom do we think we are fooling? Proverbs 15:3 tells us that “The eyes of the LORD are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.” The “wicked man” in Psalm 10 says to himself, “God has forgotten; He covers his face and never sees.” [2] This man is in for a real shocker at the Judgment. If we become complacent about our sin, our pride can cause us to forget about God and the fact that He is with us always. It is difficult to focus on Him if we are too busy thinking about ourselves.

We do not need a lookout to help us hide our sins from God, but we need one to warn, “Careful! God is watching!” I contend that we do indeed have such a lookout who is watching our backs, and his name is Jesus Christ. Our Lord gives us the example of a righteous lookout, one who does not try to get us to hide our sins, but rather to eliminate them. He even warns us not to be caught off guard by his return:

Mark 13:33-37
(33) Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when that time will come.
(34) It’s like a man going away: He leaves his house and puts his servants in charge, each with his assigned task, and tells the one at the door (the lookout) to keep watch.
(35) “Therefore keep watch because you do not know when the owner of the house will come back–whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or at dawn.
(36) If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping.
(37) What I say to you, I say to everyone: ‘Watch!'”

In George Orwell’s novel, Nineteen Eighty-Four [3], everyone in society is under continuous and complete surveillance by the ruling party, led by Big Brother. The people are surrounded by huge telescreens and constantly reminded that “Big Brother is watching.” As if that isn’t scary enough, the Thought Police are also responsible for uncovering “thought-crimes.” Thankfully, our big brother, Jesus Christ, is watching us with a different motivation–love. He wants us to live our lives to the praise and glory of our heavenly Father. His prayer for us in John 17 reflects his beautiful heart of love for us all.

John 17:20b and 21
(20b) “…I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message,
(21) that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.

If we are to meet this goal of being one in purpose with Jesus and God, then we need to have integrity in our daily walk. Our lives and hearts are completely exposed to them at all times, not just when it is convenient for us. When we acknowledge God and Jesus throughout the day, we will be more aware of their watchful presence. We can make a more diligent effort to be holy and blameless, because we are, as Nate would say, “Nakey-Dakey” before them.