Top 14 Signs You’re A Side Chick

There you have it, all top 14 signs that you are a side chick,Whether we like it or not, the “Side Chick” phenomenon is very real all around the world.

Have you ever heard any lady say, “I just found out my boyfriend is getting married”?

And there are also young ladies who know they are side chicks but do not mind being that.

here are some ways to know if you are a side chick!

He doesn’t answer your calls
He is MIA during weekends and public holidays
He doesn’t want to label your relationship / He hesitates to introduce you to people as his “girlfriend”
He is not worried when you cancel set date plans
He only pays you physical compliments
The only time you can call is late at night. If you call anytime before that ur call is rejected.
YOu’re out with Dimarco and he says, “sometimes people call me Keith.”
He makes you duck down in the car at every stoplight.
You only know his nickname cuz he claim he don’t give out his government.
It’s not that I don’t want people to know about us, I just don’t like my personal business in the streets is all.
U only know his nickname. “Yea, girl, me & KNUCKLES s’posed to hang later..aint heard from him yet.”
You can’t come over, my ex still live here. I sleep on the couch though.
If all of your “good” jewelry is from Forever21.
He stays with a fresh line up and clothes & your toes look burnt breakfast sausages.

There are those of us who have become entirely addicted to our hair extensions. Not only have we been wearing weaves for so long but without it we tend to feel extremely bare. There is no denying that a woman’s hair definitely enhances her natural beauty and we need not look further than the television screen to validate this fact. At London’s Luxury Hair we believe in the beauty of all things, we appreciate the feminine beauty of all women, of all color, body sizes and shapes, after all, sexy is more an attitude than anything else. We encourage our “Royals” to celebrate their existence, to enjoy every bit of themselves, to own their intrinsic beauty as at no time do we wish to underestimate the power of physical appearance.
We do however feel that it is equally important to take just as much pride in and to care for your natural hair even while choosing to wear your virgin extensions. We encourage all our Royals to invest in organic coconut oils and argan oils to properly treat and care for their natural hair, especially the delicate edges and hairline. I can easily recall days when after uninstalling my extensions, I was forced to wait for days until my new virgin hair arrived and my saving grace was knowing that I could easily smack some perm in my natural hair, put it in a ponytail and take confidence in the fact that I had a full head of healthy hair and wasn’t bald headed. So while we understand that as women, we will look fabulous, we want those Rapunzel tresses and we will be fierce with it, I also encourage my sisters to devote equal amount of care to their own natural tresses as well.
Extra care should be taken when installing any extension in any method, whether it’s clip in extensions, sew-ins, braids or fusions. It is vitally important not to cause undue stress to the hairline as long-term stress can lead to traction alopecia. It’s a great idea to install your extensions as far away from the hairline as possible where the hair is thicker and will not be affected by the extensions. If your install causes you to hurt or your hair is being pulled to the point of discomfort, do not hesitate to direct your stylist to loosen your braids. An install should never hurt and if it does, it’s more a disservice to you than anything else. Feel celebrated and beautiful whether you choose to go natural or rock an expensive weave – either way Royalty is still our birthright.

At some point, this is just going to turn into a picture post because I truly don’t know what to say about the 5’4″ 420-pound LA resident Mikel Ruffinelli who, according to online UK mag, Closer, holds the title of having the largest hips in the world at a circumference of 8 ft. Well, one thing to say for starters is Miss, excuse me, Mrs. Ruffinelli loves her body. The 39-year-old has been married to her husband, Reggie Brooks, 40, a computer technician, for 10 years and the couple are the proud parents of three children. Mikel also has a 19-year-old son from a previous relationship whose birth, she says, sparked the spreading of her hips. She told the mag:“After having Andrew in 1994, I went from 13st and a size 16 to 17st and a size 20 and couldn’t shift it.”

Three kids later, that size jumped up to 32, accompanied by a 42D bust and a 40-inch waist (and don’t forget 8ft hips).“I put [the weight gain] down to my pregnancies,” Mikel said. “I don’t see why else the weight would go to my hips, although, I do eat lots.”
“Lots” means 3,000 calories a day, which Mikel points out for someone her size is not a lot. She also says she was an athletic teenager and never had a problem with her weight until she became pregnant at 22. And though big hips run in her family, Mikel says no one’s are quite as big as hers. But that doesn’t bother her. “I love my shape and I see no reason to diet because I don’t have health problems. I love Mexican food, English breakfasts and chips. My husband finds my shape Hot and we have an amazing time in bed – there’s no position we can’t do! He tells me I’m beautiful every day. Men don’t fancy skinny girls, they like an hourglass figure. When I walk down the street I can hear people using cameras and saying: ‘Look at her fat a**.’ Fortunately, I rise above it. I don’t want to get bigger, but I don’t want to lose my curves. I look great. I hope I inspire women to think, ‘She’s happy with her body and I can be too!’”

http://madamenoire.com/256022/she-rock-them-8ft-hips-meet-mikel-ruffinelli-the-proud-owner-of-the-biggest-hips-in-the-world/

Minister of National Security blames man incarcerated in maximum security facility for ongoing scamming epidemic.  Strange but true. IrieFm news reported :- Dancehall lovers are reacting following a statement made by Security Minister Peter Bunting who bashed Vybz Kartel for his song Reparation, which the Minister says justifies the ills of scamming. According to dancehall fans, Minister Bunting should deal with the problem at hand and not search for a scapegoat. They also express that entertainers should be mindful of their social responsibilities.  Security Minister Peter Bunting made it clear in a recent press conference that incarcerated dancehall deejay ‘Vybz Kartel’ contributes to the ongoing scamming issue that has been a major problem for the Jamaican Government. Bunting quoted Kartel’s lyrics from his single “Reparation” which also features Gaza Slim calling it “an amazing piece of propaganda for scammers.”

I am not a Gaza fanatic and there are some things about Mr.. Palmer mi just dont like. But, I like some of his songs which I find relevant or catching  or entertaining, or all three. But that is me and I am entitled to have my personal opinions and express them just as how Adi has his personal views and is entitled to express them in song. Is either you listen to him songs on the radio or skip them or let the Broadcasting Commission do their job and ban what needs to be banned from the airwaves. And that was exactly what they did to Kartel’s song “Reparation”. But I do not fool myself. Adi appeals to a wide cross section of society, remains a marketable force, is business savvy and is able to create synergies in his approach to the world of entertainment. Mr. Colouring Book has won several awards, has received critical acclaim and most recently has been nominated for a Grammy Award.  This is for a man who has been in jail for over a year now, facing several charges ranging from murder to perverting the course of justice. By the way, some of those charges seem to have either been dropped or going no where.

So I find it disturbing that the Minister of National Security can come out and blame the prisoner/Grammy Nominee for being contributory to the scamming debacle affecting the island. Minister Peter Bunting, who has been in the job for over one year, has conveniently sidestepped the failure of his Cabinet to implement legislation that effectively blankets the activities of scammers. With all the bruhaha about how many are locked up, how many laptops, monies and high end vehicles seized, the charges laid against the apprehended are always lacking substance. And it has been said repeatedly that the current laws  do not capture the criminal genre that the individuals are suspected of being involved in. In April, 2012, Deputy Commissioner of Police in charge of Crime Glenmore Hinds admitted that “There is in fact a deficiency in our current legislation to seriously impact the activity.” The top cop lamented that charges usually laid against scammers are heavily restricted to the Larceny Act. He said obtaining money by means of false pretence, conspiracy to defraud and money laundering are among the common charges. “These are offences that do not attract significant punishment,” Hinds said. Speaking at a forum concerning the lottery scam  in November 2012, the Director of Public Prosecutions Paula Llewellyn admitted that there is no criminal charge that specifically refers to scamming. She went further to call for the implementation of an Advance Fee Fraud Act which would help to clamp down on persons involved in the multi-million dollar lottery scam. The Advance Fee Fraud Act is currently used in Nigeria to combat criminal activities which are similar to the lottery scam. So, the current reality, for which Minister Bunting has portfolio responsibility, is automatic bail, investigations placed on the never ending roller coaster called “ongoing” and suspects returning to do what they know best. And he blames Vybz Kartel who has been remaded to a maximum security facility.

When the Minister stated that entertainers should be mindful of their social responsibilities, his polka dotted mind forgot that he is part of an administration that demanded $60 million (nearly usd640,000.00) for sixteen new SUVs for Ministers of Government. This is at a time when the economy is in the tank, IMF discussions are stalled and 80% of the budget is spent on paying debt. Minister Bunting must go back to his text books on civics and social studies and appreciate that, unlike him, Mr. Palmer was not elected by the people and he is a singular private money making business. It is a cold hard fact that Mr. Palmer owes Jamaica no obligation to sing Ring Ding and Religious Choruses and if his songs, as detestable as some may be, find mass appeal, he will always continue to make money. The song “Reparation” can be given deep thought and intellectual reasoning blah blah blah, and be accused of lending legitimacy to a dubious activity. But that is what scamming is, dubious and nothing higher. It aint illegal nor unlawful. Furthermore, Minister Bunting must remember that scamming was born and nurtured during the period 2004-2007 and thereafter took off like an Olympian on crack. Therefore, the PNP, which was in power then and is is in power now, has continued to drag its foot in dealing properly with the problem, just as how the issue of campaign financing has taken a back burner. But again, we are reminded of the hushed talk that several PNP contributors are members of the scamming mafia.  Songs that rebel against the establishment and which exalt ‘antisocial’ dealings are not new. Minister Bunting, should take a break from Nina Simone and Billie Holiday and listen to our local champions like Buju Banton, Gregory Isaacs and others.  Following this erratic outburst, dont be surprised if next week the Minister starts pointing his accusatory finger at Bob Marley’s grave and blame his remains for the flourishing ganja trade and the multitude of Jamaicans who “light up dem spliff”. Our National Heroes like Nanny and Paul Bogle are next, because they will surely be labelled criminal king pins.

Peter Bunting better get with the programme and realise that Jamaica is now kept afloat by hundreds of thousands of Jamaicans who earn a honest bread in the “unofficial sector” in order to put bread on their tables, to send their children to school and to throw dem partner money. Minister, ah want you to note that the majority of hardworking Jamaicans who get up by 3/4 each morning and guh sleep at 11/12 dont have a stable 9-5 job and each lunch at Pegasus Hotel. Suh yuh try get a grip of yuhself. Big up all trying Jamaicans who refuse to take up the gun and naw support nuh war despite the economic and social temptations. Mi ah talk the robot taxi and bus operators who keep Jamaica moving and mek plenty police, nurse and other civil servants reach dem poorly paid work pon time, the cash for gold traders in HWT and other town centers who provide ready money for honest people who want some cash fi guh pay JPS and NWC, bag juice and banana chips sellers who provide the most popular and perhaps only diet many Jamaicans can afford. Finally, big respect to that little old lady who has her stall infront of the school. That old lady may not have a food handlers permit or can read and write, but she ever clean, never yet give the pickney dem bad belly and always have a smile on her face.

Man fi get kuff?
I recently enjoyed a weekend at a hotel on the north coast, very memorable and extremely relaxing.
Whenever I ‘do’ all inclusives I follow the words of the restaurants meal times to the letter, so I unfortunately gained twenty unwanted pounds from the food and drink, but I also gained some useful insight which will form the basis of this weekend’s drivel from my pen to your eyes.
Whilst enjoying my short stint, I had occasion to sit in and listen to the stories and remarks being made at the bar by people from various places throughout our small planet. Two instances stood out.
One guest was locked out of the room by the roommate and sported what looked like a handprint across the left jaw. Another even more interestingly had dark glasses on, at night, and mumbled constantly about divorce. What was even more amusing was that in both instances these guests were men!
Now I don’t know what led to these acts of violence by the women, nor do I care, but it caused me to wonder if nowadays women were taking the words of my now Christian deejay friend, Shelly Thunder to heart — “Sometimes a man fi get kuff” — must be what was predominant in their minds when the ‘slaughteration’ occurred.
Of course, I don’t have to tell you how the other men at the bar, including the bartenders, some not so discreetly, aired their views on the matter and how it would have been handled if it were them, while the ladies in attendance, including yours truly, smiled with pride at the small victory.
Now, don’t get me wrong, domestic violence by either party should not be condoned, but there is a little twisted side of me that says Yes, you go girl! when a woman gets the upper hand. Kudos to both men, they retreated to the bar instead of retaliating with blows of their own. They are real men, contrary to the views held by some other male guests that night.
It was a “win” in my mind for all the women that suffer domestic abuse at the hands of the so-called men that they encounter. Albeit, there are a few women who consider it vital to their existence and I’m not here to judge them. They have male counterparts. A few men love a rough woman; I’m talking hard core dominant forceful women. I have a man-friend that lived in an abusive relationship with a real ‘thugs’ girl. She smoked weed and drank hot Guinness like it was oxygen. People, she battered him night and day. I used to do the rounds with him seeking medical attention for his various bruises because pride would not allow him to call upon a male friend. As far as his family and crew were concerned, he played ball with some vicious unruly men, well that was the story and I used to endorse it, but never again.
I finally intervened and convinced him that this was a bad situation and went for him one night after the Sea cow had beaten him properly and left in search of a strong ale. We hurriedly packed up all of his clothes and shoes and I even tied down his mini fridge on the top of my car, singlehandedly!! I was willing to sacrifice space in my one room, to allow him time to recover and get back on his feet. The woman turned up just as we were about to drive off and summoned him and he stepped out of my vehicle with his things, telling the woman “C’mon man, you know that Elva is a comedian. You nuh see that a little joke we a run, me not leaving you”. Mi shame like a dog. Never again! They are no longer together, but the embarrassment lives with me forever.
Now I would never hit a man, if the relationship reached to that level, then its better I walk away. Besides, there are people I can pay to do that, if the situation warranted it! Don’t follow me it’s just the song in my head, “sometimes a man fi get koof” for real. Be kind to each other folks. Send comments via email to [email protected], on Twitter @ElvaJamaica or like my Facebook fan page Elva Ruddock. Stay blessed

Read more: http://www.jamaicaobserver.com/entertainment/Man-fi-get-kuff-_13424016#ixzz2IU8bfXkL