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40 Mistakes men make during Sex

1) NOT KISSING FIRST:
Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you’re paying by the hour and trying to get your money’s worth by cutting out nonessentials. A proper passionate kiss is the ultimate form of for*play.

2) BLOWING TOO HARD IN HER EAR.
Admit it, some kid at school told you girls love this. Well, there’s a difference between being erotic and blowing as if you’re trying to extinguish the candles on your 50th birthday cake. That hurts.

3) NOT SHAVING.
You often forget you have a porcupine strapped to your chin which you rake repeatedly across your partner’s face and thighs. When she turns her head from side to side, it’s not passion, its avoidance.

4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST.
Most men act like a housewife testing a melon for ripeness when they get their hand on a pair. Stroke, caress, and smooth them.

5) BITING HER ni**les.
Why do men fasten onto a woman’s ni**les, and then clamp down like they’re trying to deflate her body via her breasts? ni**les are highly sensitive. They can’t stand up to chewing. Lick and suck them gently. Flicking your tongue across them is good. Pretending they’re a doggie toy isn’t.

6) TWIDDLING HER ni**les.
Stop doing that thing where you twiddle the ni**les between fingers and thumb like you’re trying to find a radio station in a hilly area. Focus on the whole breasts, not just the exclamation points.

7) IGNORING THE OTHER PARTS OF HER BODY.
A woman is not a highway with just three turnoffs: Breast Ville East and West, and the Midtown Tunnel. There are vast areas of her body which you’ve ignored far too often as you go bombing straight into downtown Vagina. So start paying them some attention.

Error! Filename not specified.GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED.
Poor manual dexterity in the underskirt region can result in tangled fingers and underpants. If you’re going to be that aggressive, just ask her to take the damn things off.

9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT.
Condom disposal is the man’s responsibility. You wore it, you store it.

10) ATTACKING THE CLITORIS.
Direct pressure is very unpleasant, so gently rotate your fingers along side of the clitoris.

11) STOPPING FOR A BREAK.
Women, unlike men, don’t pick up where they left off. If you stop, they plummet back to square one very fast. If you can tell she’s not there, keep going at all costs, numb jaw or not.

12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY.
Women hate looking stupid, but stupid she will look when n*ked at the waist with a sweater stuck over her head. Unwrap her like an elegant present, not a kid’s toy.

13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING for*play.
Stroking her gently through her panties can be very sexy. Pulling the material up between her thighs and yanking it back and forth is not.

14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA.
Although most men can find the clitoris without maps, they still believe that the vagina is where it’s all at. No sooner is your hand down there than you’re trying to stuff stolen banknotes up a chimney. This is okay in principle, but if you’re not careful, it can hurt – so don’t get carried away. It’s best to pay more attention to her clitoris and the exterior of her vagina at first, then gently slip a finger inside her and see if she likes it.

15) MASSAGING TOO ROUGHLY.
You’re attempting to give her a sensual, relaxing massage to get her in the mood.
Hands and fingertips are okay; elbows and knees are not.

16) UNDRESSING PREMATURELY.
Don’t force the issue by stripping before she’s at least made some move toward getting your stuff off, even if it’s just undoing a couple of buttons.

17) TAKING YOUR PANTS OFF FIRST.
A man in socks and underpants is at his worst. Lose the socks fist.

18) GOING TOO FAST.
When you get to the pen*s-in-vagina situation, the worst thing you can do is pump away like an industrial power tool – she’ll soon feel like an assembly line worker made obsolete by your technology. Build up slowly, with clean, straight, regular thrusts.

19) GOING TOO HARD.
If you bash your great triangular hip bones into her thigh or stomach, the pain is equal to two weeks of horseback riding concentrated into a few seconds.

20) COMING TOO SOON.
Every man’s fear. With reason. If you shoot before you see the whites of her eyes, make sure you have a backup plan to ensure her pleasure too.

21) NOT COMING SOON ENOUGH.
It may appear to you that humping for an hour without climaxing is the mark of a sex god, but to her it’s more likely the mark of a numb vagina. At least buy some intriguing wall hangings, so she has something to hold her interest while you’re playing Marathon Man.

22) ASKING IF SHE HAS COME.
You really ought to be able to tell. Most women make noise. But if you really don’t know, don’t ask

23) PERFORMING oral s** TOO GENTLY.
Don’t act like a giant cat at a saucer of milk. Get your whole mouth down there, and concentrate on gently rotating or flicking your tongue on her clitoris.

24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN.
Men persist in doing this until she’s eyeball-to-pen*s, hoping that it will lead very swiftly to mouth-to-pen*s. All women hate this. It’s about three steps from being dragged to a cave by their hair. If you want her to use her mouth, use yours; try talking seductively to her.

25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX.
Sperm tastes like sea water mixed with egg white. Not everybody likes it. When she’s performing oral s**, warn her before you come so she can do what’s necessary.

26) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO.
Don’t thrust. She’ll do all the moving during fellatio. You just lie there. And don’t grab her head.

27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM p*rn MOVIES.
In X-rated movies, women seem to love it when men ejaculate over them. In real life, it just means more laundry to do.

28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES.
Asking her to be on top is fine. Lying there grunting while she does all the hard work is not. Caress her gently, so that she doesn’t feel quite so much like the captain of a schooner. And let her have a rest.

29) ATTEMPTING ANAL SEX AND PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.
This is how men earn a reputation for not being able to follow directions. If you want to put it there, ask her first. And don’t think that being drunk is an excuse.

30) TAKING PICTURES.
When a man says, “Can I take a photo of you?” she’ll hear the words “__to show my buddies.”
At least let her have custody of them.

31) NOT BEING IMAGINATIVE ENOUGH.
Imagination is anything from drawing patterns on her back to pouring honey on her and licking it off. Fruit, vegetables, ice and feathers are all handy props; hot candle wax and permanent dye are a no no.

32) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS.
There is no less erotic noise. It’s as sexy as a belching contest.

33) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES.
If she wants to do advanced yoga in bed, fine, but unless she’s a Romanian gymnast, don’t get too ambitious. Ask yourself if you want a sexual partner with snapped hamstrings.

34) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE.
Read this carefully: Anal stimulation feels good for men because they have a prostrate. Women don’t.

35) GIVING LOVE BITES.
It is highly erotic to exert some gentle suction on the sides of the neck, if you do it carefully. No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty scarves for weeks on end.

36) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS.
Don’t shout encouragement like a coach with a megaphone. It’s not a big turn-on.

37) TALKING DIRTY.
It makes you sound like a lonely magazine editor calling a 1-900 line. If she likes nasty talk, she’ll let you know

38) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES.
You have to finish the job. Keep on trying until you get it right, and she might even do the same for you.

39) SQUASHING HER.
Men generally weigh more than women, so if you lie on her a bit too heavily, she will turn blue.

40) THANKING HER.
Never thank a woman for having sex with you. Your bedroom is not a soup kitchen.

—
Life is like a grammar lesson; you find the present tense, but the past perfect.
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Benjamin Nana Banyin Rhule
When is part 2 coming?…educative n funny..
Friday at 4:39pm · Like
Sarafina Arsenal
hhmmmmmmm nsem piiiiii
Friday at 4:46pm · Like
Dell Creppy
**********
Friday at 4:56pm · Like
Vincent Akonor
Saved!!
Friday at 5:34pm · Like · 1
Nana Adez
Hmmmmnnnn! Dis one be free consultation. He’s spoken on our behalf so ovr to u guys, u knw wht to do. Lets see a change.
Friday at 6:02pm · Like · 6
Bluv Bright
Serious lecturing.
Friday at 7:23pm · Like · 1
Autfatt Mattary-Gyamfi
very interesting!
Friday at 7:54pm · Like
Andrew Krapa
great!!!
Friday at 8:40pm · Like
Shaka Bello
REALLY?
Friday at 8:48pm · Like
Issaka Azara
Sure
Friday at 11:57pm · Like
Ntombi Casiwe
Iyoooo how i wish u can put it in his head worse 28 dis is soo true man de is a project if u follow it & pass blv me u would be a good student Hahaha : )
Friday at 11:58pm · Like
Kwame GH
Oh yeah… Some laudable education
Yesterday at 12:16am · Like
Prince Mbah
Lol!
Yesterday at 12:45am · Like
Selasi Kumassah
masters class lecture
Yesterday at 1:34am · Like
Kusi Amankwaa
Ei. Mpenyinsem paa
Yesterday at 1:59am · Like
Nana Osei
Whrecks Ahsareh & Tony Abban Brown, i know u guys were doing ur thesis, any thing to learn from?
Yesterday at 2:04am · Like · 1
Ras Kpobi
A lot learnt in fee minutes
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Bernie Kobby May-Adams
Ede beeeee keke
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Darlington Richard
hmmmm
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Cuba Kofi Adunkwaa Antwi
Free lecture worth thousands of cedis.lol!
Yesterday at 3:33am · Like
Quuqua Aidoo
Just hope de men will pay more attention to dis, very true.
Yesterday at 4:07am · Like · 2
Daniel Ennim Amuzu
Wow…very informative…
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Tony Abban Brown
yep and what about u? hahahahaha
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Justina Quist
wow’ fetched from a deep well of a woman.
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Selom Dzotsi
PG 18
Yesterday at 4:45pm · Like
Phebe Nelson
Well said
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Amere Martins
quite expository.
8 hours ago · Like
Okeh Clement
hmmm
7 hours ago · Like
Natasha Moncrieffe Dunn
You ain’t never lie !!!!
3 hours ago · Like

Blue and Bey. (HBO/Twitter)More than a year after her birth, Blue Ivy Carter is finally being shown off.
In Beyoncé’s HBO documentary, “Life Is But a Dream,” which premieres on Saturday, the singer shares a touching moment of her with her now-13-month-old daughter.
But 24 hours before the baby’s big debut, a still from the 10-second interaction was leaked on Twitter … and instantly became a retweet phenomenon.
In the shot, Blue – clad in a white crochet sundress – is standing up on her mother’s lap as Beyoncé, her hair in braids, is beaming from ear to ear at her pride and joy.
[Related: Beyoncé’s Interview With Oprah Touches on the Singer’s Miscarriage, Her Father, and Jay-Z]
Although Beyoncé and Jay-Z did reveal their newborn’s face on Tumblr when she was first born in January 2012, they have made it a point to cover her up when out in public ever since.
In “Life Is But a Dream,” the “Halo” singer also reveals her pregnant belly, squashing rampant rumors she faked it and instead had a surrogate carry her daughter. In one scene, before she announced she was expecting at the 2011 VMAs, Beyoncé tells the camera, “So this is my belly and I’m 20 weeks … if you can see that I’m pregnant I’m just going to have to own it! My baby may be debuting itself on the awards.”
[Related: Beyonce Calls Blue Ivy Her ‘Best Friend,’ ‘Homey,’ and ‘Road Dog’]
She also talks about the first time she felt Blue kick from inside her belly. “Made me cry,” she says. “Kicked five times, I’m so excited!”
However, there was another big Beyoncé-centric revelation on Friday. In her Sunday night interview with Oprah Winfrey, the singer reveals that while pregnant with Blue she packed on a good 57 pounds … which she then had to quickly lose for a big four-night concert weekend last May in Atlantic City, New Jersey.
“I did a show three months after giving birth, which was crazy,” Beyoncé tells Oprah. “I had clearly never given birth, and I didn’t know that I would gain 60 pounds … 57 pounds.”
But Beyoncé managed to shed every single pound in time for her first post-baby performance thanks to a strict diet and exercise regimen. “Y’all have no idea how hard I worked!” the singer, clad in a body-hugging silver bodysuit, exclaimed at the time to the first night’s sold-out audience. “They had me on that treadmill. I ate lettuce!”
However, it’s not all about Beyoncé and Blue during the OWN interview. The singer also gushes to Oprah about her husband, who she says she was friends with for a year and a half before they even went on their first date.
“I would not be the woman I am if I did not go home to that man,” she shares, adding that what the two have “just gives me such a foundation.”